Insight On First Sight

I heard on the radio yesterday that out of the 76% of people who believe in love at first sight, 48% of men believe in it and only 28% of women.  Men say they “fall in love” at first sight where for women it takes more than sight.  Although I believe in initial attraction, I must say that I certainly fall into the remaining  24% who find love at first sight to be extremely rare if not actually non-existent.

First sight, or the first moments of a meeting between any two individuals is essential for an attraction.  Although the physical appearance of a woman may cause a man to stand a bit taller, it is important to maintain that there are a lot of very ugly people wrapped in attractive packaging.  The articles that I read on this subject caused me to wonder if it’s “love” or “lust” that these people fall into.  Lust at first sight I can see happening...but true love?

Women seem to weigh more than the physical in their assessment of whether or not the man is worth their time.  For example, in the animal kingdom, it is the male who is adorned with a brighter array than the female of the species.  Yet, as attractive as he is physically, he must show the female more than his brightly colored tail feathers if he expects to be chosen.  In my opinion, humans are the same.  The male is attracted to a female.  He already decides that he wants her to like him, so he struts his stuff.  If what he has to offer doesn’t fit into what the woman wants for her mate, he’s out of luck.  I guess he’ll just have to “fall in love” again next week.

Of course, there are many instances that, what a man thought was an amazing woman (based initially on sight), turned out to be real dud on his mate-meter.  She may have nothing in common with him, which beats the relationship down in a hurry.  This is why I don’t believe that it’s “love” that they fall in.  In my mind LOVE encompasses more, way more.

True love incorporates far more than the physical.  When two people sync in intelligence, mindset, compatibility, and spirituality level, they will each find the other beautiful physically.  Because you see the person as a whole, there are no physical flaws.  “Love is blind” it not?

My point is this, don’t “fall” into anything.  Falling is an indication of having no control over the situation.  When one falls, they must land.  Odds are that your landing will not be on your feet and you are more likely to get hurt from the fall.  We fall when we rush into something with little or no forethought.  When we rush God’s will for us, we fall and can expect injury.  Speaking as an experienced wound-licker, I now believe that it is important to grow in love.  Step, with logic, past the initial attraction and discover if that person is worth getting to know with respect to spending your life with them.  The older I get, the more I believe that life is too short to waste a moment of time with someone you should never have considered being with in the first place.  It may behoove you to form a detailed list of what you want in a life partner.  You can’t get to know someone if you don’t know yourself.  How will you have anything to offer to them?

2 Corinthians 6:14, states for believers not to be unequally yoked with unbelievers.  When two oxen are tethered (yoked) together, they must be of equal strength in order to pull a cart.  If one is stronger, or of temperament that doesn’t match the other, the cart either doesn’t move at all, is moved in circles, or tips over; its contents destroyed.


I will never forget a question posed by a pastor during a sermon on this subject.  I believe it to be the best for assessing if someone is worth your attention beyond that initial attraction.  “Can I serve God better with this person by my side...or by myself?”